Those of us who are married know that after a few years, for many it is complicated keep living together. Day by day and routine end up bored and jaded at the couple, and that is when crises and fights begin. It seems that it no longer works.
It is a bit difficult to keep the flame alive, but also break the routine. Passion can disappear quickly if you don't we spend time building the marriage and to the maintenance of the project in common that began the day of 'yes I want'.
Many times we think that the marriage is over or that it no longer works for a specific or specific thing, but the most of the time it is a series of problems that accumulate over the years.
How do you know it doesn't work anymore?
Let's analyze a few signs that marriage is really over. Pay attention, since, later, we will give some advice to try to save the situation and have a stable marriage again.
The first thing we should observe is if the negativity is part of our lives. We all have crises or certain moments when we do not see that the relationship will work out well, but when it really has to end it shows right away.
If you or your partner really have want to fix the situation and improve the relationship, but the other is resentful or unwilling, most likely not going forward or with good intention.
Also, when there has been a episode of infidelity and do not feel remorse. You can agree or not, but infidelity is a situation that can be overcome; With work, much apology, love and compassion.
But if you or your partner are unfaithful and deceive the other and show no regrets for what happened, it is a clear sign that not worth fighting for saving a marriage in which there is no love.
Another of the signs is lack of intimacy. And we are not referring only to the lack of intimacy for sexual relations, although this is something fundamental in the couple. If not also to the intimacy of having type contacts: holding hands, hugging or kissing.
If this type of intimacy no longer exists in your marriage it is a bad sign. There is clearly something that is not working, because intimacy is something extremely necessary For a couple to work.
One of the most indicative signs is trust. In a couple where no trust there's not much to do. If you can't count on the other person or you don't feel like telling your day at work, or going out together and making plans ...
Share things with each other, talk about feelings Having and trusting the other person is key to the proper functioning of the couple and the marriage. If they no longer write or sit down to talk, it is a clear sign of lack of interest.
And, last but not least, a very clear signal is that there is no longer love between them Marriage members Well, it is love that really gives strength to move on and fix things.
What can I do to fix it?
The first thing is to sit down and talk. Do we really want to stay together? If the answer is yes, then there are some things that we have to keep in mind to start changing and improving the relationship.
First of all the most important thing is that each one feels good about oneself, in balance, with its own domain say. Neither he has control over everything nor she can't live without him.
We must find a balance that is healthy for both and for the relationship. This is linked to the following: give space. Everyone must have their own space where to feel free and relaxed to think and reflect on what is happening in the couple.
Too we must avoid arguing, and, above all, avoid arguing hot. It is better to postpone the discussion for a few hours and make it cold with the thoughts in order, thus saving bad words that we do not really feel and that make the situation worse.
Now come the two most difficult things: make personal changes And apologize. To be able to fix a situation that does not work, the first thing you must change is yourself. Because if, finally, you fail to save anything, you both must continue with your lives.
Then you also have to reflect and apologize for mistakes committed. This must be done with courage and determination without it being too late. Nor should it be forced. Let everyone retire to reflect and then apologize if necessary for their mistakes.
As you see, couple relationships are not easy, and marriages can deteriorate over time. But, if we put effort into it, we can overcome those potholes ... Because that is what marriage is, after all!
It may interest you: When reconciliation is possible in the couple